Long back in the past, when there were more than 10 children in a house (make sense for people from India and Asian countries), did parents worry about bringing up the kids like this millennial gen parents? Thanks to the concept of joint family there was a hierarchy at every home where the breadwinner(mostly “Father”) was given due respect and the entire family was taken care of by an elderly person at home(grandma or grandpa).
So the kids grew by observing and admiring elders, learning the morals themes inside the family, understanding the hierarchy and capacity to play along in the group without a second thought. This helped them to crack the social challenges when they grew.
Apart from that, their day to day entertainment from the elders is to listen to stories of fantasy and magic which never misses to med with a moral and ethical core. More specifically there was an elder person to talk with and had their own siblings to play with. The mother who was pregnant was taken care of with due responsibility by fellow elders that led to the good development of the baby.
But now the proliferation of nuclear families has eliminated the presence of an elder. Women entering the workforce is more common than ever. As in most of the families both the parents are employed. That makes the millennial parenting really a difficult and challenging task.
Fine, now how to bring up a kid? Remember that “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”. Early character building and habit formation are the essential start-up. Here’s the 6 practices inspired from the ‘old-school’ parenting methods which I presonally experienced in my childhood and I implement myself to my kid.
1. Follow a daily routine with your kids.
Habituate together. Get used to good things and doing good things together. This will give plenty of time to over-see your child’s growth in every area starting from hygiene to study.
2. Be a role model
Your child trusts no one but you. Kids don’t do what said to them, on contrary, they do what they see others doing. Especially they are molded by parents’ action and reaction, not based on their advice.
Doing routines together will help them to learn timing order, social interaction, respecting other’s time, and much more. This one particular practice has many benefits that I couldn’t comprehend here. Kids learn by example.
3. Be an authoritative parent
Be Assertive, not arrogant. Be authoritative, not dominating. Authority with love is the key tip that speaks about the parenting style.
An authoritative parent listens to the kid; disciplines the kid with warmth; makes use of reasoning to explain either rules or situations; has behavioral control over kids; motivates and uses positive reinforcement instead of punishment and above all allows autonomy and independence. Accept the smartness of the kid and allow them to grow as effective men/women who can handle situations in life with positivity.
4. Involve in both schooling and life activities of the kids
Go to their world, instead of speaking things from your world to them. In the past, children had enough social connections to share their world. In nuclear families, it is not the case. It is not about children’s loneliness. It is about moderating influences on them. Know what inspires them, where they struggle, what they afraid of, etc. As a parent, your intuition will say how to solve the problem if you understand the nature and cause of them.
5. Have control over your emotions
Cliche. You know what I meant by that point. Self control, patience are the fundamentals of parenting. Don’t expect your child to understand you, if you can’t understand them with patience and you understand well yourself to control your urge to react instead of putting out a well thought out act.
6. Family Lunch/Dinner is essentialPoint
May look classic. Believe me, it is the thing we follow from stone-age. Family dinner is vital for good bonding and dependancy. Make this an important rule in your family.
All the best for your parenting. 🙂